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Happiness Is A Short Sad Song

by Syd Lewis

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1.
we're gross 01:23
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2.
burnt up knockdown-dragout 03:18
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There's a show tonight And I'm thinking about going this time Can't lie it's been a while for me To take up any ride, to give you any lie Religion it speaks of temple bodies But fine feels like a cemetery Nothing memorable for the worms to feed Nothing memorable for the worms to eat I need the noise, laughter like chrome Caliber of lights than to stay at home Never a good dancer, always danced alone Never a good dancer, always danced alone Pretty love you want to take this charm about This ghastly knockdown drag-out Did you think you could actually reach me Baby, did you really think you could climb my lime tree I need the noise, laughter like chrome Caliber of lights than to stay at home Never a good dancer, always danced alone Never a good dancer, always danced alone I need the noise, laughter like chrome Caliber of lights than to stay at home Never a good dancer, always danced alone Never a good dancer, always danced alone I was never a good dancer, always danced alone I was never a good dancer, always danced alone
3.
feelin' lonely tonight 03:25
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While next to warmth of someone else's head Are you thinking about me in your bed Worthless as the things lovers said It crumbled like ash when they were fed Are you feeling lonely tonight I'm certain the next one after me Will get it extra sweet and rather easy You'll tell them exactly how you feel And they might just cherish you for being real Are you feeling lonely tonight Are you trying to forget about me Standing in the doorway I used to key Remember how long it took for us to leave Hiding my brain with smiles that I teeth Are you feeling lonely tonight Has someone licked your wounds of memory Regurgitating the illusions you had of me I've said nothing but roses of you and sensibilities Of my experience of you, feeling everything Are you feeling lonely tonight Are you feeling lonely tonight
4.
sleepy dude 02:05
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5.
a part 04:00
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I have sore by my eyes From being double-down in bed After waking and you're not there When I lift my head How I wish, I wish with every cell That I could be a part of your plan Autonomy for me has been hell And it's not enough to be a lovin' man A smile that could cut through Such a dark world just for me But I suppose your pretty face Could be made for most anybody How I wish, I wish with every cell That I could be a part of your plan Autonomy for me has been hell And it's not enough to be a lovin' man How I plea my surrounding arms Could stop the pain again But I don't have much to my name No fortune or fame, just a play in your game How I wish, I wish with every cell That I could be a part of your plan Autonomy for me has been hell And it's not enough to be a lovin' man Far in the places you'll roam No one there to watch you grow For I was a fun stone to throw A friend you were ready to let go Far in the places you'll roam No one there to watch you grow For I was a fun stone to throw A friend you were ready to let go Far in the places you'll roam No one there to watch you grow For I was a fun stone to throw A friend you were ready to let go...
6.
else 03:59
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My love, my love You had great expectations After all I'd try to help But you wanted me to be someone else Dirty towels, messy bed Bodega hot sandwiches fed You didn't mind those days Avoided the roommate you'd hate You never came to me, did you Just a cold room to use This place I'd pay for rent It was no fan fort Wasn't it so damn convenient I'm tired of feeling so hurt You say it's the same for you But I'm the one not worth it Do you know how it felt To be expected to be someone else There's a gaping hole in my soul Stained with falling leaves from willows Trying to fill this ditch to seem whole But the void reappears where blood used to fall I look into the bathroom's mirror at my face Practice my smile in this hiding place No one will ever know of my case How I comfort myself with mantra Before I walk into the world to brace Ain't it a shame to love someone Want them to change into whatever they wanted Admire how they are as your heart melts But they only saw you as someone else
7.
the crunch 03:43
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Too much too little or not enough too fat too thin or nobody laughter or tears or immaculate non-concern haters lovers armies running through streets of blood waving winebottles bayoneting and fucking virgins or an old guy in a cheap room with a photograph of Marilyn Monroe many old guys in cheap rooms without any photographs at all many old women rubbing rosaries when they'd prefer to be rubbing cocks there is a loneliness in this world so great that you can see it in the slow movements of the hands of a clock there is a loneliness in this world so great that you can see it blinking in neon signs in Vegas, in Baltimore, in Munich there are people so tired so strafed so mutilated by love or no love that buying a bargain can of tuna in a supermarket is their greatest moment their greatest victory we don't need new governments new revolutions we don't need new men new women we don't need new ways wife-swaps waterbeds good Columbian coke water pipes dildoes rubbers with corkscrew stems watches that give you the date people are not good to each other one on one. Marx be damned the sin is not the totality of certain systems. Christianity be damned the sin is not the killing of a God. people are just not good to each other. we are afraid we think that hatred means strength we think that New York City is the greatest city in America. what we need is less brilliance what we need is less instruction what we need are less poets what we need are less Bukowskies what we need are less Billy Grahams what we need is more beer a typist more finches more green-eyed whores who don't eat your heart like a vitamin pill we don't think about the terror of one person aching in one place alone untouched unspoken to watering a plant being without a telephone that will never ring because there isn't one. more haters than lovers slices of doom like taffeta people are not good to each other people are not good to each other people are not good to each other and the beads swing and the clouds cloud and the dogs piss upon the roses and the killer beheads the child like taking a bite out of an ice cream cone and the ocean comes in and out in and out under the direction of a senseless moon and people are not good to each other.
8.
lukewarm receptions 02:44
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Does it have to be this hard to part ways Holding onto one last final gaze Greedily clasping that bitter embrace Oh how comfortably warm it was until its decay Even though it's over we could still be friends But do I have the dignity to pick up your pieces again With good grace you turn to your future days Unescorted by bushing me up a hilly bay No more lukewarm receptions when we'd lay No more wearing happy masks of paper-mache Even though it's over we could still be friends But do I have the dignity to pick up my pieces again I walk down the streets we used to play Leaving you to your life I knew by the cafe Where you'll inhale the smoke of my burnt up name And I'll be compared to everyone who has ever brought you pain I'll be compared to everyone who has ever brought I'll be compared to everyone who has ever brought I'll be compared to everyone who has ever brought you pain Pain Pain the pain...
9.
tucked in tomato soup 02:24
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10.
at least you have me for the night 03:28
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Oh sweet little bee do you see Something in me appealing This bruised fruit of over-drinking Is my soul something you want to steal You and I could have a little fun Maybe go back to my place and play with my gun Slip out a stupid joke wrapped in a pun Who said this has anything to do with love Is there a rippling wave between your thighs Do you want to take this toy for a ride If we whisper innocent little lies I'm sure it'll be quite alright Is there a wetness that won't squeeze too tight With the right kind of eyes we'll see the morning light You know I'll treat you just right At least you have me for the night My clever words are at a loss I can be rather shy, but you're the boss Unless I know for sure, and honey I do Is this dry yearning fine for someone like you A flirtation of brushing fingers, soft eyes I desire to prove myself on more than one level Give a cause to this quirky rebel Is there a rippling wave between your thighs Do you want to take this toy for a ride If we whisper innocent little lies I'm sure it'll be quite alright Is there a wetness that won't squeeze too tight With the right kind of eyes we'll see the morning light You know I'll treat you just right At least you have me for the night
11.
broken insides 04:49
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God is too far up to see us way down here As I talked about nothing and movies Than listening to you speak over your biggest fears And I was a moron to think everything was working Success doesn't mean very much to mean Even though I'm proud of you, beauty makes me sigh I didn't mean to mess it up this time It's just the thing I do with these broken insides I know suitors will surely go your way And you'll try to share what we once made Moral support or cute things to say Hopefully they don't look past you for younger dates Success doesn't mean very much to mean Even though I'm proud of you, beauty makes me sigh I didn't mean to mess it up this time It's just the thing I do with these broken insides I sadly understand why it was over the phone You opened up, gave me everything and I was cold But like you I was scared, a rescue, and alone Everyday passes I think about dying Because where is my home I didn't mean to mess it up this time It's just the thing I do with these broken insides If you come back, reaching for what we had Hugging your tears when you were sad Silly-silly talks of our sound collabs But it's gone, ain't that too bad I'll miss calling someone my baby But I don't want to be another maybe What's the point in being a good lover When there's no one, really no one to love
12.
happiness is a short sad song 12:51
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Could you really hide your woes from me Burdens you would shroud were clear to see Wish it was another bad idle dream Even obscured in skin-tight black you gleamed Learning to forget, memories too fond Like people, seasons change and moves on Winter astray, searching for a home Waiting for a name to pop-up in a phone Speaking vacantly at me with that tone Emotional marrow eating at your bones Wasting in a bar for another show Another line to toe, postures to bow My moon I know it's hard to be alone Karma's hungry sow, sometimes lasts too long Think you were getting warmer but was wrong Waiting for your return like a dismal Chinese Tang Smiles fake and cold as a Winter's pond Calling to just another prosaic jawn Easily disowned, so you got to be strong happiness is a short sad song
13.
is this love? 04:30
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14.
windowless room 03:25
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You and I in your windowless room Together with no way to air out our gloom Silent, in a peaceful shadow and hark The sounds of my love sleeping close in the dark Telling sweet lies from a close, yet distant dream Words that cut deep but lead only to shallow streams Like the one on our faces, like the one in our books Tulips that bloomed too soon and fell into the brooks What a chaotic windowless room Nowhere for the genial sun to gloom Unkempt, but somewhere to hid your costumes And lovers that pass through this hollow tomb Telling sweet lies from a close, yet distant dream Words that cut deep but lead only to shallow streams Like the one on our faces, like the one in our books Tulips that bloomed too soon and fell into the brooks But for now awake beside you, still sleeping sonorously A face glowing in a calamitous world turning by me Until you awake then it's all over, to take flight Until your voice knives through my life to say good-bye
15.
we're a mess (not angry anymore) 02:11
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I'm not angry anymore Slouching a little less than before Trying to move on and forget Anything I thoroughly said If only I could of been ordinary But would you of seen me Wish i could of taken back being angry Or spoke up when you were comparing I'm moving on, like you, to the next Incandescence and be another ex I'm still around for now, hiding the pain I'm still around, surely for you it's the same

about

wrote and recording during this month of January 2024

credits

released January 31, 2024

photo by Alican Ors
the crutch written by Charles Bukowski
is this love a song by Bob Marley arranged by S. Lewis

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Syd Lewis Brooklyn, New York

Syd Lewis is a multi-instrumentalist and producer

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